Grief and Loss Support with Vernessa
Find strength and understanding through personalised grief support
Hello, I'm Vernessa Chuah, founder of Mindful Space and the pioneering pregnancy loss coach in Southeast Asia. I am a certified advanced grief recovery specialist, equipped to support you through trauma with deep empathy and understanding.
My training and personal journey uniquely qualify me to hold space where you can truly be seen and heard.
Recognised Expertise in Grief and Loss Support
My path to becoming a grief recovery specialist was paved with personal hardships and profound losses. I faced three heart-wrenching pregnancies—the first two ending in miscarriages and the third, a decision I never imagined making, ended in a planned abortion. These experiences, while intensely painful, have been integral to my understanding of loss and recovery.
Throughout the first six years of my marriage, I was no stranger to hospitals, undergoing multiple operations including surgeries for a severe childhood ear infection which eventually caused complete deafness in my right ear.
In 2019, I faced a potentially life-altering surgery that threatened my facial nerves and muscles—a challenge that I approached with the fear of not being able to speak clearly to my daughter again.
These trials, including the 52 stitches that now mark my resilience, have transformed my wounds into a source of strength. They've taught me to maintain a healthy inner voice and given me the power to empathise deeply with others' grief. I've learned to channel this empathy into a supportive energy that many find comforting during times of loss.
With ontological coaching that focuses on body, language, and emotions, I provide a compassionate presence for those navigating the complexities of grief and pregnancy loss.
My approach is rooted in authenticity and vulnerability, supporting both men and women as they journey through their healing process. Together, we can recognise and honour our losses without being defined by them, empowering one another to move forward with renewed strength and courage.
Did you know that there are over 40 life events which can trigger grief? This concept is rooted in the groundbreaking work of psychiatrists Thomas Holmes and Richard Rahe, who developed the Holmes-Rahe Stress Scale. This scale lists 43 life events known to cause stress and, potentially, significant health issues.
While the original scale ranks these events by stress points, I believe that every individual experiences loss fully, regardless of its point value. Therefore, I present these events not in a hierarchy, but as equally valid triggers of grief.
According to the Grief Recovery Method, "Grief is the conflicting feelings caused by the end of or change in a familiar pattern of behavior." This definition helps us understand that grief can stem from any significant change, not just from loss through death or separation.
Interestingly, not all events traditionally associated with grief are about loss. For example, getting married is included high on the list. While a wedding is often one of the happiest days in a person's life, the significant changes it brings can also be sources of stress. Similarly, a change in financial status, like receiving a windfall, can evoke complex feelings of excitement and anxiety.
Beyond these tangible life changes, there are also intangible sources of grief such as the loss of trust, approval, safety, and control over one's body. Recognising these less visible forms of grief is crucial for understanding how broadly and deeply grief can affect our lives.
You might feel stuck, a sense of loss and uncertainty. You are not sure what to do next. Everything feels upside down and gloomy. ‘How long will this last? Why you? What is your story?
Explore ontological coaching of your WAY OF BEING in your body, emotions and language. Honour the emotions, and sense your body on what it wants or need with somatic work.
Be curious about how is your story serving and not serving you. When you create a different observation, you create new possibilities. With more awareness, you have more power to make choices, freeing yourself from being victimised by the story
In the event you need more than just coaching, with me as a Certified Advanced Grief Recovery Specialist, you have the option to dive deeper into the Grief Recovery Method. This is an evidence-based method that is internationally recognised.
You are empowered with tools that you can take action for other grief and loss in your lifetime, with the aim to complete the emotional pain and any undelivered communication. There are more than forty types of grief and loss.
The Grief Recovery Method consist of seven sessions with tools to support you in the different types of losses. This method is not intended to be or substitute for professional medical or mental health services.
My commitment to supporting individuals through grief and loss has not only transformed many lives but has also been recognised across various media platforms.
From in-depth interviews to feature articles, my unique approach to healing and empowerment has garnered attention for its effectiveness and compassionate methodology.
Featured on
The Straits Times
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Mar 2023
Our help in Asia mainly involves medication, diagnosis, therapy or assessments. Many women are reluctant to seek professional support as they do not want a medical record. I wanted things to be different,” says the 38-year-old.
https://www.straitstimes.com/life/support-for-couples-who-have-had-miscarriages
Featured on
Business for Good 2023
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Jan 2023
https://www.raise.sg/component/raise/directory/directory/6961-mindful-space-pte-ltd.html?Itemid=0
Featured on
CNA 938 Radio
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Oct 2022
Baby Loss Awareness Week. Vernessa Chuah has lost babies multiple times. She now helps others as a Pregnancy Loss and Grief Coach.
CNA 938 Radio: Timestamp 15:30 - 30:08
https://www.channelnewsasia.com/listen/xx-files/baby-loss-awareness-week-3005426
Featured on
HoneyKids Asia
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Oct 2022
Both men and women experience grief after the tragedy of baby loss. But do they show it in the same way? We speak to Singapore’s first pregnancy and infant loss coach, Vernessa Chuah, to find out …
https://honeykidsasia.com/baby-loss/
Featured on
Eros Coaching
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Jul 2022
Discussion with Dr. Martha Tara Lee is a Relationship Counselor and Clinical Sexologist with a doctorate in human sexuality and master.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Enwvgslit9s
Featured on
CNA Lifestyle
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Oct 2021
There’s still a lot of stigma and shame when it comes to having a miscarriage and/or abortion. “What did I do that caused it? What else can I do? And where do I go from here?”
While pregnancy loss coaches are more commonly found in Western countries like Australia, Vernessa Chuah wasn’t able to find one in Asia. She wanted to become a pregnancy loss coach, to change how women view grief and help them move forward with hope. Every grief journey is different.
https://cnalifestyle.channelnewsasia.com/women/pregnancy-loss-coach-miscarriage-grief-284506
Featured on
Sassy Mama
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Oct 2021
I watched the procedure take place and when her heart stopped beating, I was so heartbroken, I felt like my heart stopped together with hers. I cried so badly…Staying busy became my way to cope. Thoughts of ‘I’m not good enough” would seep in when I wasn’t doing something. I packed my activities back-to-back. I was always working and taking up new courses. But the restlessness I had was really a flight response. I constantly wanted to achieve more to prove my sense of worth. Being in stress mode actually made me feel good – cortisol can be addictive.
https://www.sassymamasg.com/family-pregnancy-loss-support/
Featured on
The Finder 31
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Sep 2021
It’s this baggage that can damage a mother’s mental health, as well as her ability to be “present”. “We cannot support our children and family, if we are running thin and on 10-percent battery all the time,” says Vernessa, a mother of a 3-year-old daughter.
“Without some validation, mothers can feel like they are in a ‘pressure cooker’,” she says, adding that “a judgement-free zone is important”. In her Mother’s Circle group, women practise journalling and verbalising their thoughts to help find their voice.
https://sg.thefinder.life/read/postpartum-depression/
Featured on
Pregnancy Loss Chat with Dr Anupriya
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Aug 2021
Hear from Dr Agarwal who has lost two angel babies herself.
A former Singapore National University Hospital (NUH) Head of the Division of Benign Gynecology and Minimally Invasive Surgery.
Dr Agarwal has been running subspecialty infertility clinics for more than 15 years.
She has successfully performing Asia’s first ovarian tissue cryopreservation and reimplantation, resulting in 2 spontaneous pregnancies and livebirth.She is well-known in the medical community for her meticulous care and amiable personality.
She is currently a Senior Consultant Obstetrician and Gynaecologist at ACRM.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tgtP8fhEhJo
Featured on
The Finder 32
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Dec 2020
Despite riding this rollercoaster of emotions, some women and men are reluctant to turn to mental wellness professionals. “The public often assumes the people who seek out these facilities are ‘sick’, but these women are not sick, they want to heal,” says Vernessa, who adds, “Knowing who to go to for support is equally as important as knowing that support is available.”
https://sg.thefinder.life/read/infertility-struggle-in-singapore/
★★★★★
Thank you so much for holding space for me! To be around others who went through the same feels comforting, and strangely healing as well. I think it's a start for me to begin processing this journey, cos honestly I think I felt I just been spinning.
Dec 2021
★★★★★
I attended the expert chat by Marc. It was useful. Marc spoke about ways that the child can help oneself by speaking up and trying to come up with ways to overcome the bully, e.g looking for allies etc...it drives home the point about building our children to be creative and resilient...it will be good to arm ourselves with such knowledge to build our children...Thanks Marc for sharing and Vernessa for organising the chat! :)
Lauretta Low
Oct 2020
★★★★★
I attended the "Art & Mastery of Long-lasting Relationship" workshop organised by Mindfulness Space last year. It was a game changer for me. The centering practice taught by the coaches was so powerful. I feel connected and rooted. It makes me feel like I have a third eye seeing things even in the midst of crisis. It saves me a lot of tears and heartaches! I benefit so much in all areas of my life esp my relationships and my health. When I feel triggered, frightened, stressed or even constipated, I practice my centering and it brings me peace. I feel safe once again! With that, I am able to build on expanding my emotional safety to my loved ones and people around me. It is so powerful. Life gets better, happier and of course, smoother even for my bowels :) Thank you Mindfulness Space and all the coaches. You are amazing!
Virginia Tai
Feb 2021
★★★★★
Admiring you having the heart to use your own experience to help others! It's helpful attending the pregnancy loss circle for me esp. knowing I'm not alone and others are also struggling like me ...
Dec 2021
★★★★★
Dear Vernessa,
I just want to say a big thank you again.
After the pregnancy loss retreat, I was finally able to sleep through the night without any dreams in three years.
I am hopeful for my healing process.
Rong Ling
Dec 2021
★★★★★
Thank you Vernessa for inviting me to the previous retreat in Dec 2021. The session has so many benefits for me.
I am not saying I am 100% well but this has helped me in my healing journey :
Fellow mums or anyone who's going through loss, I ask of you as fellow mum to leverage on this blessing to help you in your journey. We are fortunate to have such resource in Singapore.
Jean Poon
Mar 2022
★★★★★
The baby loss awareness event is something that has helped me the most. To know that I am not alone in this and that there are plenty of women out there who went through so much yet are sharing their stories.
I am grateful to have experienced this moment with all of you who gave me hope and support.
The event was smooth and helped us in every aspect.
Thank you so much.
Miss J
Jan 2023
★★★★★
The last 3 years have been very eventful and painful:
But I am grateful that despite all these, there's always someone as an expert and act as a good resource for me to recover. One of whom is Vernessa Chuah.
Jean Poon
Mar 2022
★★★★★
We have been working with Vernessa and the Mindful Space team for our safe conversations for mums sessions. The experience has been positive throughout. Every little thing is provided for and Vernessa helps to ensure that event logistics are smooth from registration to end of event so that we could concentrate on the actual sessions. A great partner to have for events for sure! - Yasmin, Away from Mum Guilt
Yasmin Begum
★★★★★
The session has made me realize that I'm not alone in the journey.
I met many fabulous people in the session who can empathise all the many emotions and confusions I went through.
★★★★★
I got to know Vernessa from another webinar we both attended, where she shared her unique personal life experience overcoming various challenges and her holistic approach towards family, kids and relationship-building. She came across as being so positive, sincere, warm, optimistic, brimming with sunshiney kind of cheerfulness, and yet so gentle, affirming and nurturning. She brings all these awesome qualities into the speakers she personally handpicks and the wholesome, relationship-enhancing and family-building programmes that she personally curates.
I love how she continually seeks ways to add value to her speakers' presentations, eg through role plays. I also love her events cover a wide spectrum of topics - ranging from relationships, to health, to anti-bullying, etc. My kids also loves the dancercise classes she co-hosts with Teacher Nashwa! Our family highly recommends Mindful Space.
Carol Mei Mei Lim
Dec 2020
★★★★★
Through joining a couple of the online sessions, I've learnt and picked up new knowledges which benefited myself and most importantly my whole family. What I like about the sessions are that they encouraged 2-way communication rather than the traditional talks. It's very interactive and informative at the same time. Looking forward to more interesting topics. Thank You Mindful Space for helping us parents!
Joey Lum
Apr 2020
★★★★★
Mustered the courage to attend the Pregnancy Loss Retreat last Fri.
I was finally able to sleep through the night without any dreams in these 3 years ever since I lost my baby at Wk 32.
Feeling hopeful for my healing process.
Ching Yong Ling
★★★★★
I'd like to thank Vernessa, for showing me possibilities and for supporting me throughout the journey. Your warm approach is comfortable and making me at ease everytime.
In October 2020 Adji and I were devastated to experience the loss of Una, our stillborn first daughter.
It happened at the height of the pandemic, and it wasn't an easy pregnancy either.
I was always full of fear and anxiety.
For those who know me well, I've battled panic disorder for years, and although it has gotten better, the loss of Una made me question my wellbeing. I lost my confidence, I lost my self trust.
A good friend of mine Arya, suggested for me to reach out to a coach in Singapore who specialises in pregnancy loss.
I looked her up, and was in shocked by her own story. listened to one of her IG live, and I cried. I get her, and I felt she gets me too. I really want to reach out, but I'm scared. Scared of what's going to come out of the sessions, scared of facing my reality. But my days has not been easy since the loss. I even quit my job to focus on myself and to get better.
So in early 2022 | finally reach out to Vernessa Chuah of Mindful Space.
Her first email touched me Sa she said,
"Thank you for willing to show up for yourself even when you feel uncertain about it, this is strength." Strength indeed.
The first session was tough, I don't know what to say, I can't express myself well, it's a challenge! Aside from it being in English it is actually not easy to speak your own heart. Thankfully Vernessa is very patient with me, and really took the time to get to know my trueself.
Every session is difficult, to be honest. I always feel exhausted afterwards. But it helped me, tremendously.
Enlightenment after enlightenment | got from each sessions, I get to know myself better, things that are never accounted for gets the limelight, and the most important, slowly I gained my self trust back.
What was pregnancy loss coaching at first, turned into grief recovery sessions, as Vernessa saw that my need is not only for the loss of Una, but beyond that.
My progress was apparent. I no longer questioned and blame myself for what I am today, and especially to what happened with Una. I celebrate her visit instead.
It was bittersweet.
I know there are lots of you who experienced this, and it might not be easy for you too. It does take courage to open up, to speak, and even to feel the emotions. We tend to surpress, we tend to take light of things. I'm sharing my experience because I want you to know that it's okay to feel emotional about your loss, it's okay to struggle. For me to post this, is not easy too. But as what Vernessa said, this means strength. Please go easy on yourself, because your wellbeing is what matter the most.
Arum Dyastari
★★★★★
The session was held in a very comfortable environment where I felt safe.
It was in a space where I felt I could be vulnerable and it's okay.
Thank you for letting me join the session and helping me grow stronger and braver.
Dec 2021
October 9 – 15 is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Week, bringing awareness and light to this not-talked-much-about topic.
A time for bereaved parents to honour our beloved babies who were taken from you far too soon. Your precious child is no longer with you here physically, yet they are always a part of you and your family. Taking the time to acknowledge your love and hope for a different future.
Wave of Light happens around the world on Oct 15, 7pm (whichever time zone you are at) where we honour our beloved babies who are dearly loved and forever missed.
As people in each time zone light a candle at 7pm and keep it burning for one hour. It creates a 24 hour “wave of light” as it moves around the world where grieving parents come together to remember our babies who were taken from us far too soon.
We hold a safe and healing space when we come together with our vulnerabilities. We can express our emotions and still move forward with this beautiful energy of grief.
Together with the power of community, we release and heal with yoga movement, sound healing, art and sharing.
Restorative Yoga by Teacher Dawn, be attuned with your body and emotions as you slow down. Giving yourself space to process, acknowledge and accept.
Sound Healing by Wendy Lum, Founder of Wenyogaheal. She is the first Therapy Harp and Euphone Sound Healer in Singapore. She is certified to play Gong and Alchemy Crystal Bowls too and is also a Reiki Level 3 Practitioner.
Grief Support Circle with art expression, journaling and sharing by Vernessa Chuah. The first pregnancy and infant loss in SouthEast Asia, an advanced grief recovery specialist.
12 Oct (Thu)
6:30 – 9:30pm
3 hours of grief support circle, restorative yoga and sound healing
Mindful Space, 10 winstedt road, Block A 02-02, S227977
Open for bereaved mums, dads, and grandparents to honour our children who are gone too soon
$15 for commitment and energy exchange. Candle, yoga mat and art materials are provided
Courage is when you choose to show up for yourself even when you feel uncertain.
In this support circle, I facilitate and hold a safe space together with you. Expanding your capacity to show up for yourself.
A pregnancy or infant loss 15 years ago, or 15 days ago is still a loss. A physical part of you was taken away, yet it does not take away your self-worth.
This group is open to all men and women.
You go through a journey of mindfulness, sharing, art or journaling together as a group.
If you are currently pregnant, yet still want to process or acknowledge your previous loss. You are most welcome to join.
Just message 9783 7313 to inform, so I can pre-frame the circle and be more trauma-informed.
You are not alone.
You are enough for who you are, not what you give, not what your provide, not what you do.
Here, we embrace you for who you are.
You are heard.
You are seen.
No words can describe this loss. Grief is raw and messy, not something that can be neatly wrapped in a bow.
You are experiencing a bag of emotions and stretching to the limit of human pain. In these moments, breathe. It’s okay not to be okay all the time. You’re allowed to feel and be as you are. This is your experience and no one else’s.
Journaling can be therapeutic and healing. This book is designed with blank spaces for you to explore. Fill the empty pages with your words, drawings, poems and memories of your child who is so precious to you.
When you articulate your thoughts and emotions with paper and pen, you give meaning to the process and acknowledge how you feel. This book is your ‘mind space’ that is safe and free from judgment, criticism and advice.
There is no right or wrong way to process a loss. Grief makes way for healing so thank you for being courageous and willing to be vulnerable to process it. You are enough.
Part 1: Release
Part 2: Heal
Part 3: Moving Forward
Discover powerful personal stories in "Rise Up," where authors share their struggles and the practical lessons learned. These narratives offer inspiration and guidance for anyone navigating similar challenges, providing a treasure trove of resilience and hope.
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